Question by a student !!

Question by a student !!
If a single teacher can’t
teach us all the subjects,
Then…
How could you expect a single student
to learn all subjects ?

Impact of Movies

Impact of Movies:

Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi?

Student:- He is the one who helped
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!

Ladki ko mirgi ka attack

Science teacher :
agar kisi ladki ko mirgi ka attack ho
to use lambe time tak kiss karo isse wo thik ho jayegi.

Student : par sir use attack kaise dilaya jaye?.

At ur age hitler committed suicide

Teacher : U failure !
At ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir,
but at ur age hitler committed suicide

Sleeping improves ur General Knowledge :-P

Sleeping improves ur General Knowledge 😛
Teacher to sleepy student:
Who invented Steam Engine.?
Student: What sir?
Teacher:Yes its correct. JAMES WATT.
Moral: Sleeping improves ur General Knowledge 😛

This is Student Life Definitions Altered :D

This is Student Life Definitions Altered 😀
SPEED : Getting ready in 5 minutes
SHARING : Whole class copying one assignment but in totally different way
PRESENTATION SKILLS : Can present one answer in 5 different ways for 5 different questions 😀
EDITING : Your report contains atleast 5 pages less than the person from whom you copied
MULTI TASKING: Playing games on cell, sms to gf/bf, gossiping with seat mate, day dreaming, making teacher’s sketch and still pretending that you are listening what teacher is saying.
ART : Beautiful art on the last page of note book.
SENSE OF HUMOR : Provide best unintentional humour to teachers during Viva 😀
CONSISTENCY : Once a Zero, always a Zero!
VOICE MODULATION : Attendance in 5 different voices.
STAMINA : Tolerating teacher for consecutive 1 hour 😀
PERIPHERAL VISION: Staring at your crush, no matter where so ever he/she sits 😀
HUMANITY : Failing and keeping the consistency of giving others a chance to top! 😀
TALENT : Make whole class laugh no matter how tense is the situation 😛 😀

Tell me where is God

Teacher:
If u tel me where is God?
I’l reward u 100 rupees.
Student:
but I’ll give u millions if u tell me where God is not!

Lecture on Sun

Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!

A bull and a cow is grazing in the field

Teacher : Correct the sentence,
“A bull and a cow is grazing in the field”
Student : “A cow and a bull is grazing in the field”
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first.

Miss use of english!!

Misuse of English!
A Diagram in A Book Was Not Clear
So the Teacher Drew The Diagram On the Blackboard
&
said:
“Don’t Look At The Book Figure,Look At My Figure”:D

A person who keeps on talking…

Teacher : What do you call a person
who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
Pupil : A teacher.

A Teacher lecturing on population

A Teacher lecturing on population –
In India after Every 10 sec a
woman gives birth to a kid.
A Santa stands up-
we must find & stop her!.

How do u spell crocodile

TEACHER: Johny, how do you spell “crocodile”?
JOHNY: “K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L”
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
JOHNY: Maybe it’s wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

Pair of strange socks

Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing,
one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Santa: Yes it’s really strange.
I’ve got another pair of the same at home.

Scientific formula of water by santa

Teacher: what is the scientific formula for water?
Santa: h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.
Teacher: nonsense! how did you derive that?
Santa: auntie, it is H to O (h2o)!

What is my age?

Teacher:
(1)There is a frog,
(2)Ship is sinking,
(3)potatoes cost Rs 3/kg.
Then,what is my age?
STUDENT:32 yrs.
Teacher:How do you know?
STUDENT:Well, my sister is
16 yrs old and she is half mad.

Why are you praying in classroom?

In class room One boy was praying “God God”.
Teacher: Why are you praying in classroom?
Boy: Mom advised me that
before sleeping you must pray “God God”

Name one important thing

TEACHER: Arshad, name one important thing
we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
Arshad: Me!

*…PROBLEM & CHALLENGE…*

TEACHER:
what is the different between
problem and challenge????
STUDENT: 3boys+1girl=problem
1boy+3girls = challenge..

Tum 20 saal ki larki Se shaadi kroge ya…

Professor:
Tum 20 saal ki larki
Se shaadi kroge ya
Apne se 20 saal bari say … ?
Student:
Sir ! Depend karta hai k
Kon khoobsurat hay !
Aap ki beti ya aap ki biwi

My name is Sunlight…

Teacher:”What is your name?”.
Student:”Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai.”
Teacher:”When I ask a question in English, answer it in English.”
Student:”My name is Sunlight.”

Students Vs Teachers!

Students Vs Teachers :-
When We are in Class. We Are Students.
When they are in class They are Scholars.
When We Correct our Writing its Overwriting.
When they Correct their, its Correction,
When We copy from Others, We are Cheaters,
When they Copy they Quote
When We don’t do our work in time, We are Sluggish,
When they don’t do, they are Busy,
When We Joke in class, We are Jokers,
When They are joke, They are Witty 😛